Archive for God

ten years gone

August 26, 2008 · Filed under God, Marriage, Teaching, Travel

Today is my birthday. I am twenty seven. This is the first birthday that I have thought, “I’m getting old.”  I am wondering if I can still classify myself as being in my mid-twenties. I don’t think so. 

I have loved my twenties. It has been my best decade. Besides celebrating my birthday this month, I am also celebrating the time when I became a Christian. It was seven years this month.

Today I have been thinking about all my birthdays and have been able to recall some details from the past ten years. I don’t have the best memory so I thought it would be good to write them down for posterity’s sake.

1998: I turned seventeen. This was the first week of my senior year of high school. I had a pool party at my house on Red Gum. It was the first big party that I had as a teenager. It was a big deal for me. I gave out invitations, invited girls and boys, and had a great time. It was an innocent party. My parents were there and stayed in their room for most of the night. I have good memories of that party.

1999: I turned eighteen. It was my first week of college at UF. Christian had just been born earlier that week. I was living in Simpson Hall with my random roommate, Michelle, and had just finished rushing a sorority. On my actual birthday, the sorority was having some sort of induction and I was wearing a white skirt and a white eyelet shirt. 

2000: I turned nineteen. I was planning on moving out of the sorority house and ditching the sorority, which I did. I celebrated with my friend Tara over at Campus Lodge.

2001: I turned twenty. Jen and I had just moved in to an apartment at Treehouse Village. I had just become a Christian a couple of weeks before when I had been home for summer break. I had been baptized in the ocean at Jupiter Beach. I was starting my last year of college.

2002: twenty one. I had just graduated from college and moved to Orlando. Brynne was starting graduate school at UCF and we moved in together. I went to Wet n Wild for the day. I was on the hunt for a job and ended up starting soon after as a server at Buca di Beppo.

2003: I turned twenty two in Amsterdam. I had been working at the hostel for less than a month. We had a birthday celebration at dinner and ate homemade cake. Johanna, the manager and my mentor for the year, was at dinner that night. I received a big teddy bear pillow from my Shelter mates.

2004: I was still in Amsterdam and had just returned from my travels to Italy and Poland. Madelinde made me a cake and I had a delicious Greek meal for dinner. I sprained my ankle that night running up the stairs of the Shelter City and flew to Finland the next day to see Johanna, my roomie. 

2005: I turned twenty four as Chad’s girlfriend. We had only been dating for a month and we went out to dinner to a Mexican restaurant with Kathy, Sarha, and Rosie. I was living with Kathy and Sarha at the time. I had recently lost my job at House of Hope and was unemployed. Soon after, I got my job as a Language Arts teacher at Freedom.

2006: I turned twenty five as Chad’s fiance. We had gotten engaged in June, on our eleven month anniversary. We went to my parent’s house for my birthday weekend and Pat and Dale came along as well. We went out to dinner at Cheesecake Factory and Pat bought me a Nintendo DS. I had just started working at TFA and was living in the “inside-outside house” with Sarha.

2007: I turned twenty six as Chad’s wife. We were living in our cozy little place at Park North. We went to Babbo’s in College Park and had dinner with Tina, Erin, Jessica, Hannah, Richard, Wes, Suzanne, and Natalie. 

2008: Here I am today, recently having moved from Florida to NYC. Chad and I met at Central Park for a picnic lunch. I am unemployed and hoping to get a job offer this week. We are moving out of the mouse house/cub at the end of this week into our own place.

Comments (1) »

Wisdom from Chaim Potok

August 17, 2008 · Filed under Authors, Books, God, Quotes

I am on a Chaim Potok reading spree right now. I just finished my sixth book of his and I continue to be fascinated with the Jewish world that his books reveal. Four of his books that I have read have characters who are members of a Chasidic community. 

There were two quotes that were said by the Rebbe in “The Gift of Asher Lev” that were laden with truth and brought me great comfort as I continued to digest them. Here they are:

“My father, of blessed memory, once said to me, the verse in Genesis: ‘And He saw all that He did and behold it was good’–my father once said that the seeing of God is not like the seeing of man. Man sees only between the blinks of his eyes. He does not know what the world is like during the blinks. He sees the world in pieces, in fragments. But the Master of the Universe sees the world whole, unbroken. That  world is good. Our seeing is broken.”

“The Bratslaver Rebbe taught that obstacles are given us in order to make our desire even stronger. The more a thing is hidden from man, the more he desires it, and the greater chance that he will one day discover it.”

The second one immediately made me think of our invisible God. God often feels distant and it is hard to sometimes feel that we have an intimate relationship with HIm. This quote therefore reminded me that perhaps God chooses to remain more hidden out of His love for us. By remaining hidden, we will not be able to take God’s presence for granted or mistakenly view Him as common; we will thus seek Him more and through that seeking will be blessed by Him.

Leave a comment »

Unamuno quote

August 17, 2008 · Filed under God, Quotes

Those who believe that they believe in God but without passion in their hearts, without anguish in mind, without uncertainty, without doubt, without an element of despair even in their consolation, believe only in the idea of God, and not in God Himself. -Miguel de Unamuno

Leave a comment »

meaningful books

July 2, 2008 · Filed under Authors, Books, God

On the walk home from the library today I was thinking about my favorite books and by what criteria I should judge books by in order to ascertain which ones would earn the label of “favorite.” The conclusion I came to would be whether or not the book brought me to tears. Not just to tears, but really made me weep. Now if every book I read led me to that emotional state, then that would not be stringent enough of  a standard, but that is not the case with me.  I quickly recalled which books I’ve read as an adult that have caused me to weep. The three are Uncle Tom’s Cabin by Harriet Beecher Stowe, The Chosen by Chaim Potok, and A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini (that is the order that I read them as well). Not only do I remember at which point in the book that I wept, but I also remember the location where I was when I wept. I find that interesting that I remember those particular details so vividly.  I guess it goes to show that I value weeping and I do. Since knowing God, I have been able to reconnect more and more with my emotions after having felt “shut down” for a long time. For this, I am always grateful for a good cry.

But what does it testify about the book that it led me to weep? It is a testament to the author that he or she crafted characters that the reader really grew to care about and identify with on an intense, involved level. Maybe the reader could relate to an experience or emotion that a character was enduring, or maybe the reader admired who the character was and was thus able to grieve with them, as a friend would. These three books have left me feeling more human and more alive as I witnessed the characters experiencing the commonalities of the human experience like death, loss, and relational conflict. 

 Which books are your favorite? Which books have made you weep?

By the way, I picked up Dred by Harriet Beecher Stowe and My Name is Asher Lev by Chaim Potok today.

Comments (2) »

What’s in a church

June 22, 2008 · Filed under God, The Church

Since Chad and I have recently moved, we are in search of a new church. This is a very important decision for us and today we made a list of things that are important to us to have in a church.

Our ideal church would:

  1. Have intimate community.
  2. Have accountability for the leadership that is both local and non-local and that is both through individuals and other leadership that is local and non-local.
  3. Have church leadership that is financially supported by the local congregation
  4. Value theological education and seminary education.
  5. Have ministries that reach out to the poor and the lost.
  6. Be missions focused, locally and worldwide.
  7. Have solid teachings, preferably from someone who has gone to seminary.
  8. Be culturally aware.
  9. Have a “deep bench.” This means there is more than just one leader who makes all of the decisions. Void of “cult followings” of one particular leader.
  10. Be rooted in the historical church and not trying to “reinvent the wheel.” They are reverential of the decisions our spiritual forefathers have made.
  11. Welcome the Holy Spirit and anything that He might offer, even if it is spontaneous.
  12. Have women’s and men’s ministries
  13. Have engaging, alive musical worship.
  14. Have racial and stage-of-life diversity.

The list proved to be very helpful in helping us decide which church we should join of the two we were considering. We made the decision right after we went through the list with both churches.

What would be on your list?

Leave a comment »

Seattle Times article

May 12, 2008 · Filed under Article, God, The Presidential Election

This article resonates with me and my thoughts towards politics these days. It was published today in The Seattle Times.

The article is titled “Young, Evangelical….for Obama?

(Although if it were to more aptly reflect my sentiments it would be Young, Evangelical….for Hillary)

Leave a comment »

Uncle Tom’s Cabin

February 16, 2008 · Filed under Books, God, Social Justice, Teaching

I read Uncle Tom’s Cabin for the first time three and a half years ago. I started right before I left Amsterdam, and finished it after I returned to the States. It is, to date, my favorite book. I appreciate so much the character Tom who has a walk with God that is extraordinarily exemplary–he is a man, enslaved by whites, who responds to his situation and to his oppressors with compassion, love, and forgiveness. He prays for their souls, and weeps for their brokenness. While I draw strength and inspiration by his witness, this attitude that he portrays did garner criticism from African-Americans who felt that Tom was too passive, and should have shown more dissatisfaction with his position. In fact, to call someone an “Uncle Tom,” is an insult that connotes a black who is submissive and content to be in a subservient position. As I read the book, I don’t see Tom as content with his position in society–he deeply mourns the brokenness of his situation–but his faith allows him to withstand the horrors of slavery as he trusts that his God is preparing a place of peace for him in His heavenly Kingdom. Tom understands that the whites who commit these crimes against Him do so because they do not know the love of Christ and are in spiritual darkness. Ergo, Tom seeks to demonstrate that love to them, and actively chooses to live by the way of the cross, which includes loving those who hatefully persecute him.

When I agreed to teach American Literature this year, I was most excited about teaching this book. We are in the middle of it now. I have had the chance to do some research on the author, Harriet Beecher Stowe, and have really enjoyed learning about this woman of God who responded to the call on her life to use her writing talents to speak God’s truth about the slavery issue that was poisoning the U.S. in the 1800s. I was reading through the book Uncle Tom’s Cabin and Mid-Nineteenth Century United States by Moira Davison Reynolds and was blown away when I read about Harriet’s experience that led to her beginning the book.

“According to members of the Stowe family, at church Harriet had a vision. She saw a Negro being flogged viciously at the order of his master. As the man died, he prayed that those who had wronged him would be forgiven. Harriet participated in the communion service in a mechanical, distracted manner, and afterwards walked home. Later that day she wrote out her vision, using names. The saint-like man was Uncle Tom, the owner was Simon Legree, and his henchmen were Sambo and Quimbo. Then she added something: the Christ-like action of Uncle Tom made converts of Sambo and Quimbo.”

Reading that Harriet, a Christian, received this vision moved my heart to praise God. It may seem odd to think that one way God responded to the slavery issue was by moving one of His children to write a book that would challenge and anger people unto laboring and speaking out for change, but that is exactly what I think He did. Not to say that the book was the one and only thing that caused the end of slavery, but certainly it was used as one way that contributed to the dissolve of slavery. God heard the cries of the slaves and He responded. He demonstrated His faithfulness to justice when He delivered the slaves from the institution of slavery. As Harriet reminded us in her preface,

“…the great cause of human liberty is in the hands of one, of whom it is said:

“He shall not fail nor be discouraged

Till He have set judgment in the earth.

He shall deliver the needy when he crieth,

The poor, and him that hath no helper.

He shall redeem their sould from deceit and violence,

And precious shall their blood be in His sight.”

Comments (1) »

Ash Wednesday

February 7, 2008 · Filed under God, The Church

Yesterday was Ash Wednesday. Now that I am part of the Anglican community–a community that observes this day–I, along with millions of other Christians around the world, went to worship God and prepare my heart for the liturgical season of Lent. Receiving the ashes on my forehead was an interesting experience for me. I was taken aback when, as the deacon used his thumb to make a cross of ashes, said, “From dust you came, and to dust you shall return.” It made me instantly uncomfortable to think about becoming dust. This discomfort I felt is related to the general dismay I feel towards death and my own struggle to overcome the fear of death. Ultimately though, this poignant reminder of my mortality was a humbling one. One that reminded me that I have been created miraculously; one that reminded me that despite my flesh one day dying, I belong to a God with the power to resurrect me.

Now that we are in the season of Lent, I feel contented to know that I have set apart these upcoming weeks to be purposefully meditative on the things of God and my relationship with Him.

Leave a comment »

In honor

January 22, 2008 · Filed under God, Quotes, Social Justice, Teaching

I’ve had the privilege to use some of MLK’s writings in my classroom this year. He is one of the most spiritually lucid men that I’ve ever read.  Here is a quote from his letter from Birmingham Jail that speaks of a standard that, as a Christian, I find myself accountable to uphold.

excerpt from “Letter from Birmingham Jail” by Martin Luther King Junior

“Moreover, I am cognizant of the interrelatedness of all communities and states. I cannot sit idly by in Atlanta and not be concerned about what happens in Birmingham. Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere. We are caught in an inescapable network of mutuality, tied in a single garment of destiny. Whatever affects one directly, affects all indirectly. Never again can we afford to live with the narrow, provincial “outside agitator” idea.”

Comments (1) »

advent

December 12, 2007 · Filed under God, Poetry

 

Imagine perfection and He is there

 

It has been a blessed Advent season for me as I have been reminded again and again about the wonder of Christ’s arrival on earth. What has been even more exciting is to ponder His second coming. What a gift God has given us–the ability to imagine what it will look like and feel like when He returns and establishes His eternal Kingdom. To be able to go to that place and think of all the wondrous possibilities is truly a deep source of hope and comfort. He has not abandoned us. He will deliver us from evil. We will not always hurt and long and suffer.

He is coming again.

 

Maranatha…..Our Lord come

 

 

 

Comments (1) »

« Previous entries
Next Page »